Salam Alaikom wa rahamatullah

Here is the same topic again in its second episode, inshallah. What I addressed in Jumuah was that we need to first set our priorities. Do we need this life only? We seek to have the life hereafter, don't we? If we are hoping to get to Jannah in the Aakhirah which I believe every single one of us hopes, then we have to listen to what Allah, our Creator and his final messanger, peace and blessings be upon him, who clearly says:

'whoever has been granted a child from God, let him name him with a nice name and educate him (good manners and Islamic teachings) and when he attains the age of puberty and (the parents) did not get him married and thus he comitted any sin, he (father) will be responsible for the sin.'

Parents have been negligent in their Islamic duty of getting their children married and have been the cause of this sin.

LESSONS LEARNT FROM THE ABOVE HADITH:

The responsibilty of the parents starts from day one, from a very early stage in a child's life.

We see that Islam instructs us to give them a name (preferably) in the first seven days, shave their head, perform Aqiqah and even circumcise the boy and perform azan in his or her ear. I suggest parents perform azan in the ear of their child themselves so that they feel this crucial responsibility. A sister can also perform azan into the ear of her own child. We believe that azan should be performed by someone pious and religious, like your local or beloved Imam etc, but that can always be done at a later stage as well.

Education:

First things first, as they say - make a note that the Hadith under discussion mentions the word 'adab' (meaning manners and good character) and not 'ilm or Ta'leem (meaning teaching). We often mistake education/'ilm for adab or tarbiyah/manners, which is something entirely different. 'Ilm/Education is achieved through books and teachers etc, while adab or manners come through a role model and suhbah/company.

This is the reason that our beloved Prophet SAW did not write books or give long lectures to his companions - but rather led through a selfless example and is the 'best role model' as Allah describes him in the Holy Qur'an. He instructed his companions to do things the way they saw him doing them. This is what our children need - a role model who speaks the truth, stands for justice, is kind and gentle and so on. They will not be impressed with us if we are lecturing them to go to the Masjid or read Quran and be nice then we do not observe any of these ourselves.

This is exactly the reason why Allah mentions in Qur'an amongst the four goals of the message of the Holy prophet SAW, 'Tazkiyah' (tarbiyah and manners) before 'Ta'leem' (education).

So every parent's job and duty is to lead their children through example and become a role model for them by taking 'the best role model' (SAW) as their own role model.

We can not expect, my brothers and sisters, our children to be proper Muslims, responsible citizens and even good human beings simply by sending them to secular state schools non-stop for 15 years minimum, without any intervention from us whatsoever because we are busy earning a livelihood in this dunya/world - which is in Qur'anic terms 'mata'un qaleel' (Mata' = Enjoyment - Temporary pleasures, Qaleel = Short - Little).

Do we think that by dropping our children off at school in the morning, half asleep from last night, that we have fulfilled the most significant duty of being a father or mother? By admitting our children in very expensive private schools, did we discharge our duty?

Of course not, but the problem is that we mistook Ta'leem for Tarbiyah. Although both are crucial for the upbringing of a child, the most basic step that has gone wrong is that we have set our priorities in the wrong order - this life before the akhirah/hereafter whereas it should have been the other way round.

Allah says in various places in Qur'an:
 

[وَمَا الْحَيَوةُ الدُّنْيَا فِى الاٌّخِرَةِ إِلاَّ مَتَـعٌ]

(whereas the life of this world compared to the Hereafter is but a brief passing enjoyment.) Allah said in other Ayat,

[قُلْ مَتَـعُ الدُّنْيَا قَلِيلٌ وَالاٌّخِرَةُ خَيْرٌ لِّمَنِ اتَّقَى وَلاَ تُظْلَمُونَ فَتِيلاً]

(Say: "Short is the enjoyment of this world. The Hereafter is (far) better for him who has Taqwa, and you shall not be dealt with unjustly even equal to the amount of a Fatila.)[4:77] and,

[بَلْ تُؤْثِرُونَ الْحَيَوةَ الدُّنْيَا - وَالاٌّخِرَةُ خَيْرٌ وَأَبْقَى ]

(Nay, you prefer the life of this world, although the Hereafter is better and more lasting.)[87:16-17]

YOU CAN NOT ESCAPE THE END RESULT AS THIS IS THE WORLD OF CAUSE AND EFFECT. The DISTURBING results are what I posted previously (Our Dilemma).

[وَعَلَى اللَّهِ قَصْدُ السَّبِيلِ] (And it is up to Allah to show the right way.)

[وَأَنَّ هَـذَا صِرَطِي مُسْتَقِيمًا فَاتَّبِعُوهُ وَلاَ تَتَّبِعُواْ السُّبُلَ فَتَفَرَّقَ بِكُمْ عَن سَبِيلِهِ]

And verily, this is My straight path, so follow it, and do not follow the (other) paths, for they will separate you away from His path.) [6:153]
 
May Allah protect us, guide us and keep us on the right path that goes straight unto Him and keep us away from the different paths that mislead, ameen